Friday, October 06, 2006

Just found out that my friend has a blog all along... ... AND I DIDN'T know about it 'cos he thought I knew. Haha...

Anyways, reading his blog somehow reminded me of my situation at home. You know the song, 'family protrait' sung by Pink? Yeah, it reminds me of the whole picture. Its a feeling people think they might be able to comprehend, but its far from that. Nevertheless, I'm very thankful for their efforts for trying to put themselves in my shoes and comprehend the unbearable mixture of feelings - disappointment,helplessness and of cos,hurt.

You feel that there is no place to run to, nowhere to hide, no shelter from the biting harsh winds of winter seasons which seems all year round. Seasons never changed...although you thought they would, as you have been taught when you were younger. You hoped to see the sunlight again. The longing for warm candescent sunrays, that you will rush to catch, even through premature. Your longing often grew stale, but you still cling onto the element of hope, and faith.

At the same time, you know it is not the place for you, not the most idealistic place that you'd want to be in. Thus, you are trying extremely hard, with all the remaining strength you've left, to pull yourself back together. And find a way out of this desert of ice and bitterness, of which laid nothing but death. Nothing is alive.

My situation might not be exactly the same, i do not know. As you refer yourself to Sam in the movie '1 litre of tears' , I would refer to myself as Jerry in the movie 'I not stupid 2'. I blogged about my feelings in my previous blog, and about how i felt about the whole semblance of my life to his role in that movie, here -dated Saturday,April 2006.

I'll be praying for you. Its hard to be happy, but i hope to see you smile :) Press on. You'll get by, someday, somehow. :) God is good,always. Remember that.


You either make me... ... or break me, baby...

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