the truth, and the world - liars lost in the hands of time.

Ecstasy is all you need
Living in the the big machine
Oh you're so vain
Now your world is way too fast
Nothing's real and nothing lasts
And I'm aware
I'm in love but you don't care

Turn your anger into lust
I'm still here but you don't trust at all
And I'll be waiting
Love and sex and loneliness
Take what's yours and leave the rest
So I'll survive
God it's good to be alive

I'm torn in pieces
I'm blind and waiting for you
My heart is reeling
I'm blind and waiting for you

Still in love with all your sins
Where you stop and I begin
And I'll be waiting
Living like a house on fire
What you fear is your desire
It's hard to deal
I still love the way you feel

Now this angry little girl
Drowning in this petty world
And I'm who you run to
Swallow all your bitter pills
That's what makes you beautiful
You're all or not
I don't need what you ain't got

I'm torn in pieces
I'm blind and waiting for you
My heart is reeling
I'm blind and waiting for you

I'm blind and waiting for you
I'm blind and waiting for you
No I can't believe it's coming true
God it's good to be alive
And I'm still here waiting for you
No I can't believe it's coming true
I'm blind and waiting for you


;that final blow before i fall over - denial is a way to preserve your sanity sometimes, most of the time.

if i had one wish...

is to turn back time and undo all the hurt. or that you'd love me like you used to.

;breaking apart, slowly but surely...

The parties till dawn, never too much booze and hormonal teasing sex

Are just the things you need sometimes.

the rhythm of life - inevitability

The revolving globe, changing cultures, technology's rapid advancements, miracles of biotechnological researches, changing lifestyles - all because we change. and we changeD.

If only we'd stop and think. Hit that pause button and place that 'thinking hat' on for a moment. The world may change, and people change with it. That's reasonably comprehensive. However, as an individual, i started to ponder the subconscious effect that was secretly working in me.

The moral decadence gyrating my conscience incessantly. I struggle to keep myself at the brink of sanity as it continues to threaten my foothold. I prayed and pleaded to God that these emotional battles in me would cease. I'm almost deafened by the inaudible harangue my heart's screaming. Emotionally deafened.

Many already are. It seems like a God-sent solution to the little boulders we trip over on life's journey. Hey, it isn't. It's a temporary effect that shortchanges us of the little gifts of feelings that were truely God given. We do ourselves more harm than good in the long run. We're only avoiding the sorrows in an absolutely unfair exchange of our happiness. I'm not allowing myself to fall prey to such atrocity.

I know who i am, who i want to be. And you're not going to change that no matter what. The world may change, you may change but I'll not succumb. In life, we all make mistakes. But there are some mistakes we cannot afford to make.

;You might be a mistake but your influence in my life is a mistake i cannot afford. andimeanit.

b.r.o.k.e.n - how else could it be spelt clearer besides feeling it for yourself.

The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight
Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time
I am here still waiting though i still have my doubts
I am damaged at best, like you've already figured out

Deceived myself into believing that time really stood still. I really wished it could. And i tried hard enough for it to seem like it did. The tranquility of night before a new dawn, time seemed to have froze, sending a sluicing chill down the nape of my neck then the spine - if tomorrow never comes. So i sat there waiting, praying for a direction - that God would take away my emotional disposition. So much, i think i've reached damage's saturation point, battered and torn. You're watching, and you contine, unmoved, with scrutiny and nonchalence.


I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart that's still beating
In the pain, there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on
I'm barely holdin' on to you

I'm falling apart, barely breathing. If only i could describe how heart wrenching it felt. A heart ripped out of my forcefully and hung on the butcher's line at 5 in the morning awaiting hungry housewifes and their marketing baskets. Imagine the kind of helplessness and hopeless resignation. But the heart's still beating, life still goes on... and the acute pain isn't helping at all. There's gotta be healing somewhere. The incessant ringing of your name, still so vivid in my consciousness, and its all that i'm left with to hold on to. I'm barely holding on to you.

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded, I'm an open book instead
I still see your reflection inside of my eyes
That are looking for a purpose, they're still looking for life

The broken locks were a warning to me, but i succumbed to my feeelings and you got inside my head and my heart. I thought i was guarded but it ended up being the other way round, you could read me inside out.

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing
with a broken heart that's still beating
In the pain (in the pain), is there healing
In your name (in your name) I find meaning
So I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin')
I'm barely holdin' on to you

I'm hangin' on another day
Just to see what you throw my wayAnd I'm hanging on to the words you say
You said that I will be OK

The broken lights on the freeway left me here alone
I may have lost my way now, haven't forgotten my way home

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing
with a broken heart that's still beating
In the pain(In the pain) there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'),
I'm barely holdin' on to you

I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'),
I'm barely holdin' on to you

Im damaged at best. wonderful, isnt it. it just had to be you when you werent even part of my plan.

heart-break.er. period.

Where Its At
I Know Karma's Comin To Pay Me Back
I'm With The Sweetest Thang Thats On The Map
I Broke Her Heart In 30 Seconds Flat
In 30 Seconds Flat

Now How Did I
Just How Did I Become That Kind Of Guy
To Look At Girl And Lie Right In The Eye
My Momma Told Me Willy That Ain't Right
Boy Now That Ain't Right

I'm Sorry
I'm Sorry
I Didn't Mean To Break Your Heart [x2]
I'm Sorry
I'm Sorry
I Didn't Mean To Break Ya
Break It Baby
Look Baby
I'm A Heartbreaker
I'm A Heart

Where She Go
I Got Some Things I Gotta Let Her Know
To Fix The Love Now It's Impossible
But Baby Baby If We Take It Slow
If We Take It Slow
We Can Make It Work
We Just Can't Throw The Love Down In The Dirt
You Probly Think That Im A FucKin Jerk
Cuz The Way I Let You Down It Made You Hurt
I Didn't Mean To Make You Hurt

I'm Sorry
I'm Sorry
I Didn't Mean To Break Your Heart
I'm Sorry
I'm Sorry
I Didn't Mean To Break Ya
Break It Baby
Look Baby
I'm A Heartbreaker

I'm Sorry
I Didn't Mean To Break Your Heart
I'm Sorry
I Didn't Mean To Break Ya
Break It Baby
Look Baby
I'm A Heartbreaker

what am i to do with you.
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
'Cause if I don't you gonna start hating me
Cause I really don't feel the way I once felt about you
Girl it's not you, it's me

hell yea right i didnt mean to break your heart.